Truth, Dare, or Avoidance
by Skypeanon
Summary: A series of truths and dares between Obi-Wan and his "perfectly obedient" apprentice.
1. Dare 1

Obi-Wan is startled out of peaceful relaxation by the sound of his Apprentice's whiny voice:

"Master, you were SUPPOSED to be running a cooking class!"

Said Master gestures at the numerous Padawans around him.

"I am. It's called, 'Cooking of the Mind.' "

"And what is everybody doing in this 'class?' "

"Meditating on good recipe ideas".

"..."


	2. Dare 2

"Okay... I dare you..."

"I dare you..."

"Yes?"

"I dare you to apologize to Master Windu."'

"WHAT? What kind of dare is _that_? Besides, it wasn't me!"

"Anakin, I've heard from three separate Masters that it _was_ you."

"..."

"Exactly. Now go say sorry."

"It wasn't that bad, Master. Maybe he'll like it!"

"My very disobedient Padawan, dying a Master's eyebrows purple while he's sleeping _is_ that bad."

"Hmph. How did those Masters even know it was me?"

"They didn't. I lied"


	3. Truth 1

"Truth or dare?"

"Not now, Anakin."

"Okay, truth then."

"PADAWAN."

"Um... let me think."

"_Think_ about covering my left side!"

"Oops. Sorry about that."

"Anakin, had this been a real battle I could have been killed! Keep your mind on the here and now, where it belongs."

"Okay...hmmmm...What was...WAIT- I've got it! What's the worst thing you've ever said to Master Yoda?"

"You know very well that the definition of "worst" varies from person to person."

"That bad, huh Master?"

"No, Padawan, I'm just _concentrating on the training exercise_."

"Well what was it?"

"If you spent as much time perfecting your listening skills as you do playing this ridiculous game..."

"Did you ever call him a green raccoon? Worst move _I've_ ever made."

"...You would remember to cover my lef- wait, did you say you called Master Yoda a green raccoon?"

"Uh, maybe?"

"ANAKIN!"


	4. Dare 3

"Truth or dare?"

"I thought you said this game was ridiculous."

"I... don't recall... saying anything of that nature."

"You don't recall saying...? Fine, dare. But it has to be a real one."

"Good, perfect, I have it already."

"And?"

"I dare you to clean the kitchen."

"Didn't I just say that it had to be a _real_ dare? NOT apologizing to Masters or doing chores."

"I don't think you used quite that classification. Besides, countless philosophers have debated on whether or not anything we do or say can be accurately referred to as 'real'. Now we as Jedi hold a somewhat different opin-"

"OKAY, okay, I'll do it."

"Great. Now there's a small amount more to the dare."

"How could this be _more_ fun than last time? 45 minutes on my hands and knees, scrubbing the floor-"

"You have to do it all on one leg, with a hand tied behind your back, and blindfolded. And you can't use the Force."

"One leg... Now THAT'S the kind of dare I'm talking about! Something outside of the ordinary! Sure beats apologizing..."

* * *

"Master."

"Hello Anakin. I see you've finished cleaning."

"Yes."

"How was it? Better than last time?"

"Master Obi-Wan, I just spent _four_ hours on my _hand_ and _knee_."

"And what, Padawan, have you learned from this?"

"Losing limbs must suck."


	5. Dare 4?

A/N. Sorry for the long wait, but for some reason this chapter was really hard to write. Also, I won't be posting anything new from July 13th-the end of the month.

: (

* * *

"Truth or dare?"

"If you _must_, truth."

"C'mon Master, I have a really good dare."

"Fine. Dare then."

"Wait, did you just _give in_?"

"The inevitable future being a fight, I thought back to my early teachings on Jedi's aspirations to keep the peace."

"And?"

"And decided to keep the peace. It is by no means an easy ambition, my young apprentice, to hold true to this obligation, and yet, as Jedi, we mus-"

"Yeah yeah, realize the value of each life, hold no attachments, avoid the dark side..."

"You say these as if they hold no meaning."

"Of course they're meaningful, Master, but we're not going to get on with the dare if you keep talking about the 'Virtues of the Ideal Jedi.' "

"...Enlighten me, Padawan, as to which dare you are referring to."

"Y'know, the one you agreed to do."

"According to the elementary rules of this pastime, I don't have to _do_ a dare."

"Why not, Master?"

"The title of the game is 'Truth or Dare.' I have already completed a 'truth.' "


	6. Truth 2

A/N: Please, please, please, please review!

* * *

"Truth or Dare?"

"Truth."

"Okay, Padawan..."

"You expected me to choose 'dare', didn't you..?"

"I was inclined to presume that you would pursue that particular course of action. The apparent spontaneity of your decision is indeed something I did NOT foresee. "

"Um, what?"

"Yes, I expected you to choose the dare."

"But you have a truth, right Master?"

"Incidentally, I do. Tell me, what made you decide to give Master Yoda such an... interesting...nickname."

"You mean when I called him a green raccoon?"

"That is what I was implying, yes."

"It's quite simple, really. I was in the Room of a Thousand Fountains trying to meditate when I caught sight of one of the initiates taking a swim."

"_Taking a swim_?"

"Yes Master, I just said that. Anyways, I saw him swimming and thought it might be nice to-"

"Anakin, you didn't."

"-To take a dip myself."

"You were _swimming_ in the Room of a Thousand Fountains?"

"Not swimming, Master, taking a dip. So I was just getting in the water and Master Windu and Master Yoda walked in and Master Windu said, well he started on this lecture about some 'Bruck' and how, because of this guy, I shouldn't be_-_

_"_Bruck. Bruck _Chun?"_

"Yeah, d'you know him, Master...? So anyways I'm stepping out of the water like he told me to and Master Yoda decides to whack me on the ankle with that stupid stick of his."

"And that's when you called him a green raccoon."

"Yup. I still don't understand why he whacked me and not that initiate."

"..."

"Anyways, something warned me, must have been my incredible connection with the Force, that it'd be smart to run away."

"..."

"So I was trying to run in my wet cloak, and I-"

"Anakin,"

"Yes Master?"

"I don't want to hear anymore."

"Yes Master."


	7. Dare 5

"Truth or Dare, Master?"

"I believe it's high time for a dare."

"Okay, I dare you to call Master Windu a sloth."

"No."

"Fine. I dare you to stand on the roof of the Jedi Temple and call out to everyone that passes, telling them how much of a loser you are."

"No, Anakin."

"And why not? I thought Jedi 'don't have egos.' "

"And yet we have this essential attribute known as common sense, a trait that you, my Padawan, seem to require refreshing on."

"Suuure Master... but you can't reject every dare I come up with by saying 'it doesn't make sense.' That's the point of the game!"

"I must admit I hadn't thought of that. Well, if I must abide by the game's rules I guess I'm obligated to-"

"I have an awesome dare."

"...And what would that be?"

"I dare you to take a permanent marker and draw polka dots on your lightsaber hilt."

"No."

"Why?"

"It doesn't make sense."

"... ... ... Master"

"Yes, my dearest Padawan."

"I'm out of dares."

* * *

A/N: And as Anakin is out of dares... so too am I. If you have any ideas for future chapters (truth chapters or dare chapters) please post them with your review. I'll select a few ideas I like, and give you credit for them at the beginning of each chapter.

Also, thank you guys SOOOOO much for reviewing. Your kind responses are the reason I keep writing!

...SKype...


	8. Truth 3

"Truth or Dare?"

"Do I get to reject everything I don't want to do?"

"No you don't, Padawan."

"Then truth."

"I... must admit to feeling some remorse about-well how to put it-turning down some of your more eccentric dares, so-"

"You'll give me an easy truth?"

"No, don't interrupt, Anakin. So I've decided to-"

"You're not going to treat me to a _delicious meal _at Dex's again, are you?"

"NO ANAKIN, I was _trying _to say-"

"Or are you going to actually apologize, Master, 'cause that's something I want to see."

"Anakin Skywalker. That is enough."

"Fine. So what's the 'truth?' "

"In _truth_, my badly-behaved Padawan, you are going to spend the next hour-and-a-half meditating on the topic of why you shouldn't interrupt your Mas-"

"Didn't you just say you were feeling guilty?"

"I released it to the Force. I am now feeling irritated."

"Aren't you going to release that too?"

"When the time comes."

"And when is that 'time?' "

"In an hour-and-a-half."

* * *

A/N. A special thanks to every person who took time out of their lives to post a review : )

To the reviewers who provided ideas for future chapters:

Jocasta Silver: Yep, that's definitely an interesting idea. I might have a little trouble with making it in character (something I constantly wonder if I'm doing), but I'll absolutely consider it! Thanks a bunch for your review and suggestion.

SodapopXPonyboylover: Wow! So many ideas- it's like a whole pepper patch (is that a legitimate simile?) of possible chapters! I really appreciate all the thought you gave this! I'll give you credit for your ideas when I use them in the future. Thanks again!


	9. Dare 6

**A/N. This chapter is based off of SodapopXPonyboylover's review! Thanks a bunch to everyone who submitted ideas, which I just might use in later chapters (so keep a lookout).**

**Keep on reviewing- it's much of my inspiration to keep on writing!**

**

* * *

**

"Hello Master! Truth or Dare?"

"Anakin, I have more important things to do than enable your irritating need for a constant passtime. In fact, I-"

"I'll clean the kitchen for the week if you say dare, as long as I can do it with both my hands."

"Fine then, Padawan, dare."

"Okay. Get ready for the awesomest dare ever. Master Obi-Wan Kenobi, I dare you... to talk like Yoda... for an entire day!"

"...And you'll clean the kitchen, without complaint, for a week?"

"Yup. But only for a week."

"Anakin, if you hold your end of the bargain, I just might not want to stop speaking like Master Yoda!"

"Ha ha, Master, very nice. The dare starts in the morning."

* * *

"Master Windu!"

"Ah, Obi-Wan, what a surprise. Where has your Padawan gotten off to?"

"He's washing the dishes fro-, pardon me, washing the dishes from breakfast _he is."_

"...Uh... yes... well I'm glad to see he's finally taking on some responsibility and helping his Master out."

"Know, I do. When Qui-Gon's apprentice I was, always had to clean I did. Though been to impress him might that have... Hmmmmmm."

"Yeah, Padawans these days... look, Kenobi, I'd love to talk but I have a meeting with Master... Yoda- oops I mean, uh, Fisto."

"Thought he was on a mission, I did, where contact was not possible."

"Yeah, you're right, of course. I, um, meant to say Master... Master...-"

"Hm."

"Master Yoda! Fancy hearing- uh, seeing you here!"

"A mission for you I have."

"What is it?"

"Go, you will, to Alder-"

"I'll pack my bags!"

"..."

"Obi-Wan, know why he left in such a hurry do you, hmmm?"

"No, Master."

"Herh herh herh."


	10. Truth 4

"ANAKIN!"

"Mmmmphh."

"Wake up!"

"Whattimeisit?"

"Time for you to_ clean the kitchen_!"

"No. Timeforsleeeeeeeeep."

"Get. Yourself. And. Your. Over-Gelled. Hair. Out. Of. Bed."

"But Master!"

"You are going to put on these rubber gloves and start polishing the sink. Hurry and get up. You have to clean, and I have a meeting with the Council.""

"...You never tell me what your Tuesday meetings with the council are about...Fine- I'm up. What time _is_ it anyways?"

"With a padawan such as you...? Half past the edge of my sanity."

"Ha ha. Very funny Mast- WAIT! Truth or dare?"

"Hmm... I think a da-

" *cough cough TRUTH cough cough* "

"I _think_, a dare."

"... ...Please truth?"

"..."

"..."

"...well... I suppose you _are_ cleaning the kitchen. Okay, truth."

"HA! Now you'll HAVE to tell me! What exactly do you talk about during those secret Tuesday council meetings?"

"Anakin, you know I can't disclose information like that, especially since-

"No, no, I'm not asking for, like, details or anything. I'm just wondering; what's such an important issue that it has to be talked about every single week? Could it be a dying star, ... or one of the lost Jedi having sworn revenge, ... or some big huge... _thing _that just won't die, ... or, like, the mysterious occurance of sound in space, ... or-"

"I assure you it's nothing of that sort. Not quite as exciting, though still an increadibly relevant issue about which periodic disscusion is required."

"Sooooooooooooooooo... are you going to tell me?

"Perhaps..."

"Just give me one word. That's all I'm asking for. Besides, you did say 'truth'..."

"I suppose I did. Very well. Since this cannot be avoided..."

"Yes...? What's the problem? What's so concerning that it needs to be talked about _every_ _week_?"

"..."

"What?"

"..."

"WHAT?"

"..."

"..."

"...You."


End file.
